Sucked Out To Tahiti

Sandy Beach, Oahu

What do you do with someone who likes the surf? I mean BIG surf! Dangerous surf! Killer surf!

S-S loves big waves. Now this is a person who dislikes roller coasters and ferris wheels. While I am ripping my body apart on Magic Mountain she will be happy on the Peter Pan ride at Disneyworld. Why the difference? Who knows.

My first experience with this hemi-demi-semi-quasi-death wish was in Hawaii. On Oahu there is a beach where an ambulance is permanently stationed to pick up the pieces left after some surfing doofus decides they want to be ripped apart: Sandy Beach.

I, in my usual wisdom, was relaxing on the sandy shore. S-S wanted a closer look at the water. I noticed as she waded out into the blue Pacific that she was not making any effort to come back. Instantly my manly hormones kicked in. Primal energy and instinct told me to go rescue my mate. Across the sand I flew, visions of Baywatch in my head, my belly flopping up and down. I called. She turned. Our hands met. We were stuck. The shorebreak was sucking the very sand out from under our feet. She was getting sucked out to Tahiti and I was not far behind. Waves and spray pounded our bodies. I needed to pee. She turned to me, smiling. She was having fun! Well at least one of us was.  I slowly crawled back on all fours to our beach blanket. She casually strolled back, asked me if I was OK and toddled off back to the water.

Never trust people who don’t like roller coasters.